Oh! Hello everybody!

Just the lad I've been looking for.
Oh!
Clamber on my head, Fred
Whence all but you have fled, Fred
There is no contesting,
I've no way of manifesting
How much I'd prefer you dead, Fred
Oh I'm glad you like me, my Captain 'cause I trust you too.

Gratify your wim, Jim.
Jim? What happened to Fred?
He changed his name.
What to?
Chunky.
Tell me, can you swim Jim?
No, Jim can not swim.
Then step upon this plank, son
On the river bank, son
Which I have carefully arranged so that it will suddenly tip up and 
throw you into thirty feet of muddy water as you upset the trim, by 
stepping on the rim, Jim.
I say, it's not for deading me, is it Captain?
Oh course not, dear boy! Just walk along it a bit further!
Righty-ho then. Ahh. Here I am on the edge of the nice 
little wooden-type plank. It is a lovely day

Arg! Oh!
YAHHH! You've drowneded me.
I do not like this game.

I've got those When I say I trust you I don't want to be drownded
'cause I do not like those kind of game Blues.
I don't like naughty tricks that go sploo gee splat
They say harm can come to a young lad like that
And I do not like explosions that blow me back for Christmas
Out of my el-seaside bell-bottom shoes
I don't like being wetted by nasty April showers
And I do not like being nutted by Eifel and Blackpool towers
So I do not want to be drowned, nutted, deaded, hitted, splatted 
pledded!
I don't like that kind of type blues -- I don't like that
I've got them Bluebottle Blues.

Still alive?
Take this cigarette, pet.
Oh ta
No, don't light it yet, pet.
All right, now you can light it.
Are you sure that I won't be deaded or nothing, Captain?
No, no -- don't be frightened!
All right then, I'll just put a match to it, and .... 

You rotten swine you! You deaded me again.
I shan't play this rotten game no more.

Picks up fractured knee caps, replaces lug in lughole and exits 
through little hole in middle of record

I'm walking backwards for Christmas 
oh no, that's on the other side, isn't it!

